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Written by Mickey Penn
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"We simply aren't going to spend that kind of money on an employee ventilation request. The option on the building lease comes up soon, and we could be moving to Houston sooner than some think. Our budget certainly doesn't have allocations for those expenditures", retorted Dan Dollars, Vice President of Finance.
Veronica Vip, the director of employee services, then interjected. "I'm tired of dealing with these clowns. First they were putting up those childish Mr. Oh No stickers all over the place, slandering everybody. Then they're trying to organize a boycott of the men's room. Why can't we just get rid of them? Who needs a couple of corporate clowns like that? They act like they're in the 6th grade."
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'Twas the Night Before Christmas... |
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Written by Buck Wheat
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... and all through the Norpolcorp corporate conference room all eyes were fixed on the speaker making her presentation.
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Written by Buck Wheat
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Author's Note: The Space Shuttle Challenger disaster in 1986 was a terrible thing that could have been avoided with some simple technology. That was the inspiration for this story (originally published in the "Diskgruntled" newsletter in 1986), another of the adventures of Johnny Iowa.
"… I'm sorry, Mr. Iowa, but you are too stupid for this line of work. Thank you for applying."
"But..."
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Written by Buck Wheat
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"Welcome to Erratic Computers, may I help you?"
"I'm here to see Mike Droop."
"That's 'Duke'."
"Oh, I'm sorry. 'Duke'."
"You may have a chair. It will only be a minute."
"Thank you."
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Written by Buck Wheat
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At a desk in the Kremlin in Moscow in the Soviet Union on planet Earth revolving around the Sun in the Milky Way galaxy of the Andromeda local cluster within the Kanobi super-cluster of the Universe in the mind of God there sat a computer scientist cursing her terminal. True, she was connected to the largest network in Russia, but she knew that at this moment somewhere in the United States there were thousands of programmers using machines light-years beyond the capabilities of even the best that her government could offer. There had to be a better way. And, since she, Pushka Buttonov, was Commissar of Technological Assessment and Procurement, it was her task to find it. The Premier was counting on her.
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